


Jihoon

by lilyheebum



Category: Block B
Genre: Fluff and Smut, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 05:02:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4208919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilyheebum/pseuds/lilyheebum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A part of Jihoon went dead silence, heavily worried about the next day, however, Taeil just fell asleep deeply after a few lasts kisses. Jihoon slept tranquil, hugging Taeil, breathing the same air, living the same moment. Going crazy. </p>
<p>“Jihoon, I told you before I don’t like men,” Jihoon shook his head, disappointed, it was hard to believe how Taeil was so stubborn to repeat those hurtful words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jihoon

“You haven’t said a word, is something wrong?” Jihoon asked, he was concerned. 

Taeil didn’t bother to answer right away but instead he stood up, away from his best friend. A few seconds passed before he could gather courage to say something, until he finally did it.

“You know you are my best friend, right?”

“I know, and you should know that you can talk to me.”

Dearest Taeil.

Damned Taeil.

“You used to tell me everything, don’t you trust me anymore? Please Taeil.”

Taeil tried so hard to be silent but ended up sighing really loud so his friend heard him. He was extremely confused and only knew one way to survive, the words he meant to say were on the tip of his tongue and yet, he couldn’t say them out loud.

“You want more beer?” Taeil asked him, running away to the kitchen without caring of an answer. Jihoon went immediately behind him, watching his balance, being him the youngest he felt the responsibility to take care of his older friend. The Taeil who got drunk –which it wasn’t often-, was an unknown person. Always talking under his breath but never really daring to say anything, going to one corner to another. “You look so pale, as if you saw a ghost.” Said Taeil, drinking nonstop from the beer bottle. 

“I am.” 

“Kisses with alcohol taste are the best.”

And then, Jihoon suffered the unavoidable. He closed his eyes and his body tensed as he felt Taeil’s lips, so tiny and fresh with a heavy alcohol trace. He also felt a pair of arms going above his shoulders and after a while going through his shirt, touching every personal inch of him and then, making his way through his pants. It was beyond exciting and he wanted to stay that way with Taeil for a long time. Didn’t want to miss anything. 

Jihoon was trembling as he never did before. Taeil never allowed them to get that far, it had been a small kiss once but nothing more. He never saw his naked torso, or his legs, and barely his arms. He himself never showed anything to Taeil either. And the only thing that broke them apart was their underwear, the one that Taeil would take charge of strip, leaving their skin bare and going to his bedroom without looking back. And as someone madly in love, Jihoon followed him without thought.

Once he entered the room, Taeil was waiting in the bed already, receiving him arms wide open and once more, fell in a trap of delicious and eternal kisses. Throughout the curtain in the window, the light was fighting to get into the room, but just enough to make their eyes find each other. If it wasn’t for his breath, Jihoon could swear Taeil was sober, very sober. The way he was being looked at made him feel exposed, but it was okay, after all, it was Taeil who was touching him.

The youngest kept on trembling so bad that his teeth kept crashing. Everything would’ve been easier if Taeil were sober, he was terrorized by the morning after, what would be Taeil’s reaction? But Taeil was holding tight on his body, one hand in his neck and the other one in one side around his butt cheek and he liked that type of attention, the sensation of being the most important thing to Taeil was beyond words. Jihoon made his way up to Taeil’s legs, getting himself between them to the point where is length stayed in Taeil’s center. He seize that moment to penetrate him and kiss his neck at the same time, Taeil couldn’t help to groan in pleasure, he was going insane and his moaning was music to Jihoon’s ears.

If only he would’ve stopped a few seconds before that, but he couldn’t stop, Taeil was too much for him, he had to see him always, and kiss and love him as much as he could.

Taeil was moving his body against Jihoon’s movements and to create even more pleasure, he took the hand of Jihoon and put in his hot and explosive length, both going up and down, moaning and sweating. Neither of them seemed to have enough of the other. They traced their skins making an invisible road with their hands. Taeil arched his back and tried to shut down his groan in the climax. Jihoon moved faster and put his hand over Taeil’s white and sweaty chest, chasing after his sighs and the final pleasure. Taeil found himself with his fingers in Jihoon’s hair, making sure he wouldn’t go anywhere until he was breathless. He wanted to kiss him nonstop, not wanting to breathe and not caring of other people.

A part of Jihoon went dead silence, heavily worried about the next day, however, Taeil just fell asleep deeply after a few lasts kisses. Jihoon slept tranquil, hugging Taeil, breathing the same air, living the same moment. Going crazy. 

 

The sound of the door slightly closing made him wake up and he realizes he was alone, but Taeil’s place was still warm, it hadn’t been too long since he stood up. The clock said it was barely four in the morning, the sun wasn’t even awake yet. He got dressed, took a deep breath and dare to leave the room.

“You’re awake?” Taeil asked.

The sky was still dark but he greet normally.

“Yes, good morning.” He got closer to give Taeil a kiss, but he didn’t look too excited for that type of affection. He avoided looking at his eyes.

“I’m sorry about last night. It shouldn’t…”

Jihoon stood still for a few seconds, realizing what Taeil meant.

“It’s okay.” He lied. “It’s okay.”

That was the reaction he feared the most. He refused to believe Taeil dare to act like that, and yet he did. He took quickly the juice that was holding Taeil and drank it in two seconds and then left the apartment like a storm. He was hurt. He was hating himself and Taeil. How could they face each other after that night? How could he even think Taeil would go easy on him? He was very naïve, so much it was painful.

 

For over two weeks Taeil took shield on words and nothing more, not even alcohol. “I don’t like men, I told you this already.” Not realizing he was killing Jihoon.

“Why is it so hard to understand that I don’t like men? I don’t want people looking at me like a freak or if I have a disease.”

“I can defend you.” Jihoon said.

“Are you hearing yourself? I don’t need that from you. There’s no logic on that. Jihoon, I’m sorry I’m being like this, you don’t deserve it. I’m sorry for that night too, I didn’t want to get your hopes up. You know I was wasted that night. I’m sorry. You crossed the line too, you saw me like that and didn’t go. You can’t just blame all on me.”

Jihoon was able to hide his tears, but his face was so red and full of pain it could explode any second. Taeil had the habit to move his fingers without control, making them dance on his leg or any surface anyone wouldn’t notice.

“Taeil, did I do something wrong that won’t make you accept your feelings?” Jihoon’s voice sounded so broken and thin, not like the usual. It was horrible even for Taeil.” 

“It’s not something that you did or didn’t do. I don’t like men, period. I think it’s time for us to stop seeing each other.”

That last sentence was a surprise, even for Taeil. He trusted so much in Jihoon. And the youngest couldn’t believe the damage was already affecting his heart. All because of that night.

“You can’t decide that for yourself.”

“I just did. You can leave now.”

Jihoon sat there in disbelief, completely lost in that moment. “You feel something for me, and you know it. You can look for me again the day you are ready to accept me.” And once more he left the apartment without facing Taeil.

 

It was early in the morning and his thoughts didn’t rest for a single second. Never. Taeil realized that without Jihoon he wasn’t able to sleep anymore. The bedroom it was the main memory of that night, something he tried so hard to push away from his mind and yet was the only thing he could think of. How long had passed? A month? A month with the length of a year. Moments like that he felt the impulse of running towards him and never leave his side, there was a part of him that still neglected what had happened, a little, intimate but powerful part that made him hate himself. Someone like Jihoon couldn’t be serious to stay by his side, to love someone like him.

Maybe, after all, it wasn’t the world who wasn’t ready for him; more like Taeil wasn’t ready to face the world. If he didn’t dare to love himself, why Jihoon would?

The day went by and the night came, Taeil got up of his bed and went out. He walked with the wind hitting his face and like that sensation, it was refreshing. He had something to do. Took a big breath and look for a taxi. He would get Jihoon.

Taeil couldn’t denied he was scared to death, what if Jihoon wasn’t in the apartment? What to do? Leave? Wait for him? He didn’t know, but prayed under his breath for Jihoon not going anywhere. After ringing the bell a couple times he panicked, tried to run but Jihoon was faster to open the door, and so they looked at each other. It was a big surprise to Jihoon to find Taeil behind the door, but it was more surprising to Taeil to find another man steps away from Jihoon.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were busy.” And with those words he took his leave and didn’t bothered to look back and Jihoon’s voice. It was a mistake. How could he be such an idiot and believe Jihoon would wait for him? He had been an idiot and would regret his actions for the rest of his life, he could already feel the heat on his body.

The hours passed by slowly Jihoon and him could never become a “we”. Jihoon could never look at him the way he used to, neither hug him of happiness and the possibility of making new memories also vanished. He had the perfect speech, the perfect apology and everything went downhill. Jihoon and a stranger would be a “we.”

Taeil hold the beer can tight on his hand, he wanted to drink it until it was over and then get a new one until he couldn’t remember his own name, but he didn’t dare. However, he knew as soon as he did that he wouldn’t be able to stop, it would’ve been just an excuse to stop the thoughts of Jihoon, and once sober, everything would be rawer.

“Taeil? Where are you Taeil?” By the door, it was Jihoon’s voice. Definitely going insane. If he got drunk without knowing and was dreaming, he wanted to wake up, but didn’t know how. He just opened his eyes when he felt someone sitting by his side.

“How did you get in?” He asked.

“You didn’t change your password.”

“I see…”

“Can we talk, please?”

“About what?” Taeil finally looked up.

“About today. Taeil, you went to my apartment but you left, why?”

“You were busy and I didn’t want to be a burden.”

“You’re not! You had weeks without talking to me. Is there something you want to say to me?”

“I understand Jihoon, I understand if you have somebody else in your life. You don’t to come to here and say you got tired of waiting. You don’t have to explain yourself.” Taeil was trying so hard how he was breaking inside, his loins burning. He was paying with interest all the time he ignored his feelings.

“You wanted to say something to me? Please, tell me. I’m still your friend.”

“Jihoon, I told you before I don’t like men,” Jihoon shook his head, disappointed, it was hard to believe how Taeil was so stubborn to repeat those hurtful words. “I like you. And no one else. You told me that when I was ready to accept my feelings I could talk to you. But I guess it doesn’t matter, right?”

He always dreamt with those words, a confession. It was unbelievable, too good to not be dreaming.

Jihoon took charge between the two of them. He could never allow Taeil to go back in the closet and stay there forever. But Taeil seemed to be a step forward all the time. He kissed Jihoon and it wasn’t like that one night. It was a kiss without a single drop of alcohol and it was delightful. It felt like years since they had shared a kiss and their lips seemed to have the power to break any time barrier. “I can’t believe I’m doing this” Taeil said, pouring just a bit of his soul into Jihoon’s. 

Taeil sat in Jihoon’s legs, allowing him to put his cold hands on his torso. The sensations were even better being sober. Their heart race went twice as fast once their upper bodies went naked. That night was beyond wasted and didn’t care to notice anything, but in that moment Jihoon’s body was everything, and he felt a little embarrassed, but kissed him again, madly. He kissed him again and again because he wanted to, just to make sure it wasn’t a dream. Jihoon held him and laid him down on the couch, getting himself between Taeil’s legs, taking off the rest of the clothing. Both were being captives of the sexual frenzy.

Both were whispering the moans, caressing the burning skins and kissed each other like two crazy people. Jihoon stopped for a few seconds before going inside Taeil, he wanted to admired his chest, ever since they spent that night together he had been dreaming of his friend every single night, dreaming of spooning Taeil, learning every single mark on his skin, get tired of even watching him breathe. Taeil hid his face with his hands.

“Embarrassed, are we?” Jihoon asked and Taeil open his mouth to answer but the youngest shut him with a kiss. “Well, you have to get used to this, because I’ll never get tired of looking at you.” 

After a few minutes, the living room was infested by the moaning of their pleasure. Taeil stab Jihoon’s back with his nails once he began to feel the climax close. Jihoon felt it too, he put his face against Taeil’s neck and groaned until there was no more breath to exhale. He never let go Taeil’s body, he put it below his, with a tight hug to make sure he couldn’t escape this time. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Taeil said, letting Jihoon know he could see his thoughts. It had been a long way to accept his feelings, but having Jihoon so close, it was all so real that nothing in the world could make it any better. “That night, you remember?”

“Yes.” 

“Well, that night…I was ready. I was ready to accept my feelings for you, but then I couldn’t. And I’m really sorry I played with you in such a cruel manner. I’m sorry.”

Taeil had always been his best friend, but sometimes he would hide in his thoughts and it became difficult to know what he felt. He had the constant fear that his love confession would ruin his friendship. But he knew, he could feel it in his bones how the older had feelings for him too. If the contrary, they wouldn’t be there, kissing like two hormonal teenagers. Taeil had the fear to make serious mistakes, but he also had the trust that Jihoon would help him. He let out a couple sighs and hugged Jihoon. The rest of the day went by between napping and laughs.


End file.
